oh heres a picture. Kim Ann Foxman is hot!
i like it hehe.
Monday, October 25, 2010
New HairCut.
So i shaved off all my hair Awhile back and its growing back. im thinking of a new haircut and i dont really know what i want. i was gonna do a side fade and leave the top kinda short. but i really like the cut i had. i had that long mohawk. i think im getting something like that back im not leaving the back. fade. sides and back :). just leaving the top. :) im excited for my hair to grow longer to get the cut done :P
oh heres a picture. Kim Ann Foxman is hot!
oh heres a picture. Kim Ann Foxman is hot!
Zulu Nasty./ Video by TRAGIK.
yes i always tweet about tragik. shes my role model. i love her. shes great! plus ZULU NASTY is amazing in this video she can dance! :) mmm dykes.
girls girls girls. girls i do adore.
the most beautiful thing that was ever made woman! i know i like girls and talk alot about them. in this world there are so many beautiful & different girls out there. i love it. now a days everywhere i go i always see cute/handsome/sexy girls. femme and butch. im telling you again were taking over! just kidding. even better i see most lesbian couples and gays. i like seeing my kind, i feel that when i see a lesbian like a butch or what so ever i feel that we have this respect to each other even though we dont know each other.
woman are so beautiful. they can pull anything off. pixies cuts & boy clothes. how sexy is that? very sexy.
i think every gay/lesbian person probably have a gaydar. im sure i do. i always get this feeling when is ee someone i know its weird its like you just know. sometimes my gaydar isnt on point but mostly its on point. i think gay people get along better, were very friendly. thats how i feel.
I notice going to a straight club they usually check/search you. When you go to a gay club they dont even check you. i was thinking about that last time when i went to the club.
"what are they going to bring? a dildo?"
woman are so beautiful. they can pull anything off. pixies cuts & boy clothes. how sexy is that? very sexy.
i think every gay/lesbian person probably have a gaydar. im sure i do. i always get this feeling when is ee someone i know its weird its like you just know. sometimes my gaydar isnt on point but mostly its on point. i think gay people get along better, were very friendly. thats how i feel.
I notice going to a straight club they usually check/search you. When you go to a gay club they dont even check you. i was thinking about that last time when i went to the club.
"what are they going to bring? a dildo?"
Saturday, October 23, 2010
rage. gameboi night/asian night.
went with nary tai margee olga vivian karina and i saw kevin liu, matthew, goldie.
i went sober. well i only took a hit of that goody. i wanted to be sober., hm.
it was fun, so much asian gay boys. they were cute. so many. so many girls as well. :).first person bump into was goldie and matthew! aww matthew,i havent seen him for so long! that cute butt. while i was dancing i asked tai "dude what would you do if a gay guys comes to you?" she said nothing just dance. i was thinking fuck i look like a guy they might think im a guy. lmao. thoughts on my head. im not just gonna throw it at them and say "im a girl." it was so so so so so packed i couldnt even move. some really cute white girl grab tai ass! it was hilarious! the girl was dancing with another girl and she grabed tai ass outta no where and smiled and shit we saw those two girls upstairs making out like crazy on the couches. it was like a 15 min show up stairs on the couch. :) it was sexy.there was so much cute girls yummy. along the other side these two boys were going at it on the couch. so cute. then karina asked me "are you guys a couple" refering to me and tai. we just starting laughing! ohman. Wingman Wingman! dance upstairs and guess what kevin liu showed up! i havent seen him for awhile! that cute fuck. then while i was dancing up stairs a guy comes next to me and look at me and smiles and says "HI" like reallllllly loud and cheesy. then i looked at tai and i said "HI haha" then he smiles and i was like fuck i hope he doesnt think im a guy and i just starting talking to tai hahaha! he was good looking what a cute gay boy. While we danced in the hip-hop room to teach me how to dougie we left down stairs and danced some more. so much people it was fun! gay guys were coming cause mr.eyecandy kevin liu was dancing with us ;). he got them boys from left to right! Tai and I went to get water and stood there and later two girls comes and she comes to me and looked at me, i thought she was going to kiss me i was like wtf. she goes. "haha..hi..im amy." and i started giggling "haha pat." i think they wanted to dance but tai and i were drinking water and we just stood there -_-. o wells. they looked around 24+. we walked around got some fresh air outside and then dance and left. what a night it was fun.
i went sober. well i only took a hit of that goody. i wanted to be sober., hm.
it was fun, so much asian gay boys. they were cute. so many. so many girls as well. :).first person bump into was goldie and matthew! aww matthew,i havent seen him for so long! that cute butt. while i was dancing i asked tai "dude what would you do if a gay guys comes to you?" she said nothing just dance. i was thinking fuck i look like a guy they might think im a guy. lmao. thoughts on my head. im not just gonna throw it at them and say "im a girl." it was so so so so so packed i couldnt even move. some really cute white girl grab tai ass! it was hilarious! the girl was dancing with another girl and she grabed tai ass outta no where and smiled and shit we saw those two girls upstairs making out like crazy on the couches. it was like a 15 min show up stairs on the couch. :) it was sexy.there was so much cute girls yummy. along the other side these two boys were going at it on the couch. so cute. then karina asked me "are you guys a couple" refering to me and tai. we just starting laughing! ohman. Wingman Wingman! dance upstairs and guess what kevin liu showed up! i havent seen him for awhile! that cute fuck. then while i was dancing up stairs a guy comes next to me and look at me and smiles and says "HI" like reallllllly loud and cheesy. then i looked at tai and i said "HI haha" then he smiles and i was like fuck i hope he doesnt think im a guy and i just starting talking to tai hahaha! he was good looking what a cute gay boy. While we danced in the hip-hop room to teach me how to dougie we left down stairs and danced some more. so much people it was fun! gay guys were coming cause mr.eyecandy kevin liu was dancing with us ;). he got them boys from left to right! Tai and I went to get water and stood there and later two girls comes and she comes to me and looked at me, i thought she was going to kiss me i was like wtf. she goes. "haha..hi..im amy." and i started giggling "haha pat." i think they wanted to dance but tai and i were drinking water and we just stood there -_-. o wells. they looked around 24+. we walked around got some fresh air outside and then dance and left. what a night it was fun.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
im tired of my dad.
im sick and tired of his shit. he is annoying. i love him and all but sometimes you get mad at certain things. he don't seem to learn. i know your not suppose to learn if you make a mistake. it takes time and all but fuck he does this shit way to much. my dad is a alcoholic he drinks to much and he does the dumbest shit ever. he annoys the fuck out of me. he piss the whole damn family off. he is dumb. all he think about is money money money. damn alcoholic and fucking money. he doesn't think about other people and doesn't ask us first, his family. people can rip him off so easy he doesn't see that shit, it doesn't go through his head.
so what has happen is that my dad always drinks beer. every single day he drinks. he think he the boss of the house and tells my mom "oh go walk down to cvs to get me beer." its like bitch why dont you go get it your self. he comes home from work why dont he get the beer himself. he always tell my step-mom to do everything. if you drink, know you fuckin limits. i mean if you wanna get drunk sometimes its coool, but not all the fuckin time? ugh.
we had alot of cars before. but guess what happen to them? he was drunk and sold it to my neighbor for cheap. trust me when i say cheap, i mean cheap. its stupid. they persuade him so well he doesnt know. we had a new Camry i forgot what year but my grandma barely bought it for him and he decided to sell it to our neighbor. what a dumb ass. guess how many cars that my neighbor has of ours? FOUR cars. all our cars and my dad sold it to them. why do they have it? because they rip him off and since its cheap they buy it. they always buy everything from us cause its "CHEAP" my dad is dumb he spent 6000 on a eclipse and he sold it for 2000. what a dumb ass. ugh it makes me mad. Why doesnt he ask us about it or my mom he just go on and do what he wants. i know he is old and shit but still they ripping him off and its dumb because not only because their our neighbors its wierd, "like oh thats our old car all four of them" Like hey i barely got my license why dont you just give me that car? he just ends up selling the car. it really pisses me off that they play him like that and he is so fucking stupid to understand. also he sold the lexus today and he didnt get money off it because he owes the guy. you see? wow you give a car away and you get no money because borrow the person money. why DO you spend MONEY you dont HAVE. ? get it through your head.
our neighbor is smart he knows when my dad is drunk he can get whatevers. i remember when i came home i notice our computer desktop was gone. i asked my dad where was it and he said i sold it for 50 dollars. i was like what the fuck. all my shit was on there. -_-. you see what i mean, he doesnt tell no one anything at all, ugh. i hate how he doesnt think about us. what about family. he doenst think that we wanted the cars,computer,laptop. he sells everything. he thinks about money to much.
i know this sound harsh when i say i hate him and all that but i know deep down inside i love him very much. its just he should be smart sometimes and think about it. its that moment you get angry.
so what has happen is that my dad always drinks beer. every single day he drinks. he think he the boss of the house and tells my mom "oh go walk down to cvs to get me beer." its like bitch why dont you go get it your self. he comes home from work why dont he get the beer himself. he always tell my step-mom to do everything. if you drink, know you fuckin limits. i mean if you wanna get drunk sometimes its coool, but not all the fuckin time? ugh.
we had alot of cars before. but guess what happen to them? he was drunk and sold it to my neighbor for cheap. trust me when i say cheap, i mean cheap. its stupid. they persuade him so well he doesnt know. we had a new Camry i forgot what year but my grandma barely bought it for him and he decided to sell it to our neighbor. what a dumb ass. guess how many cars that my neighbor has of ours? FOUR cars. all our cars and my dad sold it to them. why do they have it? because they rip him off and since its cheap they buy it. they always buy everything from us cause its "CHEAP" my dad is dumb he spent 6000 on a eclipse and he sold it for 2000. what a dumb ass. ugh it makes me mad. Why doesnt he ask us about it or my mom he just go on and do what he wants. i know he is old and shit but still they ripping him off and its dumb because not only because their our neighbors its wierd, "like oh thats our old car all four of them" Like hey i barely got my license why dont you just give me that car? he just ends up selling the car. it really pisses me off that they play him like that and he is so fucking stupid to understand. also he sold the lexus today and he didnt get money off it because he owes the guy. you see? wow you give a car away and you get no money because borrow the person money. why DO you spend MONEY you dont HAVE. ? get it through your head.
our neighbor is smart he knows when my dad is drunk he can get whatevers. i remember when i came home i notice our computer desktop was gone. i asked my dad where was it and he said i sold it for 50 dollars. i was like what the fuck. all my shit was on there. -_-. you see what i mean, he doesnt tell no one anything at all, ugh. i hate how he doesnt think about us. what about family. he doenst think that we wanted the cars,computer,laptop. he sells everything. he thinks about money to much.
i know this sound harsh when i say i hate him and all that but i know deep down inside i love him very much. its just he should be smart sometimes and think about it. its that moment you get angry.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
keep it going louder.
major lazer - keep it going louder
the video is a trip!
nina sky is so fucken sexy . before i didnt think they were. now with that hair cut and style mmm
this was my jam!
Mike Jones - FloSsin!
"I stay flossing in that candy paint,Blowin dank,Sippin drank."
i want these.
all i can afford to shop is at st.vincents. thift shopping.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Twitter. im twating. tweeting.? jk
@pattycrabby.
i feel that i post alot on twitter. i feel that im annoying, but i dont give a fuck haha.
i know i talk to my self all the time. i know i write things that "no one" know what im talking about.
thats on purpose, i dont really want you to know i just like to talk to my self.
honestly. i talk to my self to much, i need to write it down or like type it out. sorry if you dont understand.
sometimes i tweet like normal people though haha.
i feel that i post alot on twitter. i feel that im annoying, but i dont give a fuck haha.
i know i talk to my self all the time. i know i write things that "no one" know what im talking about.
thats on purpose, i dont really want you to know i just like to talk to my self.
honestly. i talk to my self to much, i need to write it down or like type it out. sorry if you dont understand.
sometimes i tweet like normal people though haha.
Jackass 3D.
Omg. HILARIOUS movie. if you havent seen it, its a must see! you have to even though if you never watched jackass before. haha its so fucken funny. these guys are amazing and fucken funny as hell. im so down to watch it again haha. watched the movie with margee and we laughed the whole way into the movie. so hilarious dude.
thanks margaret nguyen<3
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Trust is a big ISSUE.
trust is a big ass issue to me. once i meet someone i get to know them and i trust them very quick. i feel that i trust people to quick. its just when i meet people and i know that im getting along with them ill trust them and i want them to trust me back.
people who pass my line with trust i wont give you another chance. big or small shit ill still be pissed the fuck off. i might give a chance to the people i know really long but if you cross that line with me i wont give a shit about you. i wont bother to hate you or talk shit about you cause thats wasting my time, ill set your ass aside and not give a fuck. if someone brings you up ok ill tell you the story. you need trust in everything.
heres an example:
if i lend you money i would like for you to pay me back. money is big, come on its money and its me that is lending it to you. what i really dislike is that if you wanna borrow me money im being nice lending you the money in the first place. i have lend people money the highest i lend was about 100 dollars. I lend people money because i have that trust with you. a friend of mine borrowed me money before and its not much its 25$ but its really not about the money its just that i trusted him and he didnt pay me back and started ignoring my calls and shit like that. who does that? he was a good,cool ass friend too. but like i said if you cross that line fuck that shit i anit talking to you or respecting you anymore. Another thing is if i lend someone money and you say your going to pay me on that day ill wait till that day and hey if you forgot ill give you time. i fucken hate if you borrow me money and lend someone else money and tell me "Oh get it from her/him cause she i lend her the money and its your money" like bitch you borrowed it and you pay me back i anit asking anyone else. make that shit easier your responsible. its like when you owe someone money oh he owes me so get it from him. thats fucken stupid. -__-.
what i also dislike is when im talking to someone and people who doesnt like that person try to make me go against the other person. thats stupid i give everyone a chance. That has happen before and it was no big deal i didnt care about people talking about the person i was talking to. dont tell me those shit, its just wasting my time. i rather hear it from the person them selves.
"i give everybody a chance till they cross that line"
people who pass my line with trust i wont give you another chance. big or small shit ill still be pissed the fuck off. i might give a chance to the people i know really long but if you cross that line with me i wont give a shit about you. i wont bother to hate you or talk shit about you cause thats wasting my time, ill set your ass aside and not give a fuck. if someone brings you up ok ill tell you the story. you need trust in everything.
heres an example:
if i lend you money i would like for you to pay me back. money is big, come on its money and its me that is lending it to you. what i really dislike is that if you wanna borrow me money im being nice lending you the money in the first place. i have lend people money the highest i lend was about 100 dollars. I lend people money because i have that trust with you. a friend of mine borrowed me money before and its not much its 25$ but its really not about the money its just that i trusted him and he didnt pay me back and started ignoring my calls and shit like that. who does that? he was a good,cool ass friend too. but like i said if you cross that line fuck that shit i anit talking to you or respecting you anymore. Another thing is if i lend someone money and you say your going to pay me on that day ill wait till that day and hey if you forgot ill give you time. i fucken hate if you borrow me money and lend someone else money and tell me "Oh get it from her/him cause she i lend her the money and its your money" like bitch you borrowed it and you pay me back i anit asking anyone else. make that shit easier your responsible. its like when you owe someone money oh he owes me so get it from him. thats fucken stupid. -__-.
what i also dislike is when im talking to someone and people who doesnt like that person try to make me go against the other person. thats stupid i give everyone a chance. That has happen before and it was no big deal i didnt care about people talking about the person i was talking to. dont tell me those shit, its just wasting my time. i rather hear it from the person them selves.
"i give everybody a chance till they cross that line"
it didnt feel like it happen.
fuck i was fucking highass fuck last night -_-. it was tooo much. charity hit me up and wanted to hang out. walked over to her place and we went to the "jungle" and kick it and smoked smoked smoked. i notice i get high really fast. shit happen but it felt like nothing happen. time usually slow but time was flying! we took "few" pictures ended up like fucken 100 something pictures! she raped my camera. haha we walked around and we sat on the floor at the CACHE chicken mural by roybal for awhile. we stayed there like we were bums. it was really nice the street lights and just being outside talking and laughing. hmm everything went by quick. great laughs. great stuff. great great great.
Monday, October 11, 2010
NATIONAL COME OUT DAY.
10.11.2010
hi im pat and im gay!
it takes time to come out of the closet but when your comfortable and feel that its the right time to come out :) .your not alone.
hi im pat and im gay!
it takes time to come out of the closet but when your comfortable and feel that its the right time to come out :) .your not alone.
i love i love i love
Love DARLING! check them out.
found out about them on "THE REAL L WORD"
close friends to whitney
i want to see them live!
found out about them on "THE REAL L WORD"
close friends to whitney
i want to see them live!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
movies movies movies.!
here are some movies i want to watch.
BLACK SWAN! mm natalie portman and mila kunis
CYRUS!
POST GRAD!
LOVE AND OTHER DRUGS!
SOUL KITCHEN!
theres so much movies
BLACK SWAN! mm natalie portman and mila kunis
CYRUS!
POST GRAD!
LOVE AND OTHER DRUGS!
SOUL KITCHEN!
theres so much movies
Jelousy/Clingy
oh this subject. lets just say i am a very very very jealous person. im not a jealous person towards people/friends having stuff. for example "oh she has a new ipod" im jealous. im more of a relationship jealous bitch. i get very clingy when im talking to someone im really interested in. i fall fast. its like falling off a damn cliff with noone at the end to catch me. falling for someone i fall hard. when i get attached to someone i want them all the time. it gets annoying. i know im clingy and im a very jealous person. i can say that i calm down, i try to control it even though i know its hard. when im talking to someone i like i feel that i need to talk to them everyday and sometimes i think i annoy them. i gotta stop that. its just i like making the person feel speacial. what i dislike most is that when i do something really nice and simple for someone they dont even show that they appreciate what the fuck i do. people need to show it more. if a friend did something nice for me ill thank them. little things counts. simple things.
i remember i liked someone so much i was going insane. like literally insane and thinking back on it, i laugh about it. i think i changed. before i didn't really open up as much. i usually keep shit to my self, but now im opening up about shit and being real. i remember always texting that person everyday and flirting at school and phone calls and going out and all those little stuff. "she was straight." its funny though.. cause i know shes straight but sometimes when i would come over to hang out she would kiss me and in the back of my head im like wtf. i remember all the little shit we would do and it felt like we were in a relationship. i was so clingy i started to push her away =(. i learned. i would get mad at her for talking to guys and hanging out with them. its weird i got so jealous even though we weren't together. she was the first girl to make me cry i felt that i liked her so much and she just led me on. i felt that she just like the attention i give her. after the whole incident happen i tried moving on but it didnt work cause we had class together. when the school year was ending i found out something horrible and right when she told me her self i just couldn't take it anymore, i had to stop crying for her. i never ever cried in front of her though because i know im showing my weakness. when highschool was done we see each other here and there but not as much. its weird we were at a party and she starting going on me and kissing each other. i felt bad cause her boyfriend was there and she would sneak a kiss and bite my lips when he would go to the other room. its just funny now i dont care anymore if she has a boyfriend or not. i know if i was in the stage in highschool i wouldnt want to be a homewrecker. but whatever i dont care haha lets have fun ;) ok maybe not. only if you dont mind ;)
"if your gonna do something.. do it for you!"
i remember i liked someone so much i was going insane. like literally insane and thinking back on it, i laugh about it. i think i changed. before i didn't really open up as much. i usually keep shit to my self, but now im opening up about shit and being real. i remember always texting that person everyday and flirting at school and phone calls and going out and all those little stuff. "she was straight." its funny though.. cause i know shes straight but sometimes when i would come over to hang out she would kiss me and in the back of my head im like wtf. i remember all the little shit we would do and it felt like we were in a relationship. i was so clingy i started to push her away =(. i learned. i would get mad at her for talking to guys and hanging out with them. its weird i got so jealous even though we weren't together. she was the first girl to make me cry i felt that i liked her so much and she just led me on. i felt that she just like the attention i give her. after the whole incident happen i tried moving on but it didnt work cause we had class together. when the school year was ending i found out something horrible and right when she told me her self i just couldn't take it anymore, i had to stop crying for her. i never ever cried in front of her though because i know im showing my weakness. when highschool was done we see each other here and there but not as much. its weird we were at a party and she starting going on me and kissing each other. i felt bad cause her boyfriend was there and she would sneak a kiss and bite my lips when he would go to the other room. its just funny now i dont care anymore if she has a boyfriend or not. i know if i was in the stage in highschool i wouldnt want to be a homewrecker. but whatever i dont care haha lets have fun ;) ok maybe not. only if you dont mind ;)
"if your gonna do something.. do it for you!"
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Jenny&Nikki Sex scene.
mia kirshner is so fucken hot... damn!
the beginning is the same as the other video, but just watch it, its longer. :)
the beginning is the same as the other video, but just watch it, its longer. :)
Thursday, October 7, 2010
if i had a dick for a day.
this question comes from my favorite show " The L Word"
i remember asking margee what she would do if she had a dick for a day.
i would like to get my dick sucki would jack off for an hour
i would dick slap a girl
i would have sex and be a whore
i would stick my dick in someone ass
i would tuck my dick in.
i would paint my dick
i would wear tight jeans to show some dick
i would flash
i would pee outside in the bushes!
"you dont need a dick to fuck"
what would you do if you had a dick for a day?
i remember asking margee what she would do if she had a dick for a day.
i would like to get my dick sucki would jack off for an hour
i would dick slap a girl
i would have sex and be a whore
i would stick my dick in someone ass
i would tuck my dick in.
i would paint my dick
i would wear tight jeans to show some dick
i would flash
i would pee outside in the bushes!
"you dont need a dick to fuck"
what would you do if you had a dick for a day?
if you really knew me.
currently listening to The Temper Trap - Fader . <3
"if you really knew me." inspired me. lets open up.. if you really knew me.
my real name is jennifer nguyen,i really prefer pat.i got the name pat from a friend of mine in 3rd grade. he said i looked like a boy but im a girl so he will call me pat. i am 19 years old. birthday is on april 14. i have a step mom who came into my life at age 3,also two step sister's & a brother. i live with my dad,stepmom,uncle, step sister. one of my step sister lives with her boyfriend and my step brother goes to school in riverside. i have 3 dogs. i am currently not going to school right now. i graduated at the small school near by my house downtown business magnet. i met great friends there. i dont make sence when i talk but i sometimes understand myself. i cannot spell and im very bad at english and those essay bullshit. i hate school. i dont feel happy when im at school. oh yeah im a lesbian. came out around 10thgrade. im more of a tomboy/butch. "im a soft butch, hard femme!" i never had a girlfriend, i dated few girls. im 5'2 very short i wish i was taller. im fat , i eat alot. hey i cant help it. i love to go bike riding. i had my first bike july 4 2008. it was a galaxy girl frame 10speed. biking makes me feel better when im depress. its my get away. i like to bike alone, but company is fine. i love music. i dont think i can live with out music. everyone needs music. i like different type of genres. i like a little bit of everything. e v e r y t h i n g. i dont think im to picky. my dad drinks alot of beer and i can say he is a alcoholic. my step mom likes to gamble all the time. i already went through the stage that i was left out before. when people make fun of me i dont take shit up the ass. i dont really care. im drama free. i never fought with anyone. i dont waste my time on shit like that. i have great friends. i dont really hang out with them as much anymore but i know im the same person. if they need me i know ill be there. im a caring/loving person. im a teddy bear ;). im a jealous person. im clingy sometimes. i like to wear my red converse with no socks. i have a favorite black t shirt that has bleach all over it. i wear underwear under my boxer. i have a 4g pink ipod i got for 25dollars. i feel girly sometimes. i have a mustache and i want long sideburns. i like hair. i have 1 in a half inch armpit hair. i have hair downstairs. i shaved it before but i think i prefer hair. im a virgin, i never had sex before. i think alot of people is cute/hot/sexy. im very shy.
theres more ... to be continue.
"if you really knew me." inspired me. lets open up.. if you really knew me.
my real name is jennifer nguyen,i really prefer pat.i got the name pat from a friend of mine in 3rd grade. he said i looked like a boy but im a girl so he will call me pat. i am 19 years old. birthday is on april 14. i have a step mom who came into my life at age 3,also two step sister's & a brother. i live with my dad,stepmom,uncle, step sister. one of my step sister lives with her boyfriend and my step brother goes to school in riverside. i have 3 dogs. i am currently not going to school right now. i graduated at the small school near by my house downtown business magnet. i met great friends there. i dont make sence when i talk but i sometimes understand myself. i cannot spell and im very bad at english and those essay bullshit. i hate school. i dont feel happy when im at school. oh yeah im a lesbian. came out around 10thgrade. im more of a tomboy/butch. "im a soft butch, hard femme!" i never had a girlfriend, i dated few girls. im 5'2 very short i wish i was taller. im fat , i eat alot. hey i cant help it. i love to go bike riding. i had my first bike july 4 2008. it was a galaxy girl frame 10speed. biking makes me feel better when im depress. its my get away. i like to bike alone, but company is fine. i love music. i dont think i can live with out music. everyone needs music. i like different type of genres. i like a little bit of everything. e v e r y t h i n g. i dont think im to picky. my dad drinks alot of beer and i can say he is a alcoholic. my step mom likes to gamble all the time. i already went through the stage that i was left out before. when people make fun of me i dont take shit up the ass. i dont really care. im drama free. i never fought with anyone. i dont waste my time on shit like that. i have great friends. i dont really hang out with them as much anymore but i know im the same person. if they need me i know ill be there. im a caring/loving person. im a teddy bear ;). im a jealous person. im clingy sometimes. i like to wear my red converse with no socks. i have a favorite black t shirt that has bleach all over it. i wear underwear under my boxer. i have a 4g pink ipod i got for 25dollars. i feel girly sometimes. i have a mustache and i want long sideburns. i like hair. i have 1 in a half inch armpit hair. i have hair downstairs. i shaved it before but i think i prefer hair. im a virgin, i never had sex before. i think alot of people is cute/hot/sexy. im very shy.
theres more ... to be continue.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
kissing/making out.
currently listening to Mike Posner - Please dont go.
i think a kiss is a kiss. pecks/simple kisses. nothing special.well it is special its cute but talking about kissing someone and people make a big deal out of it. i remember telling my friend Lucy Ta i hate making out. i felt like making out was kind of disgusting i guess because i don't really enjoy making out. i remember whenever a girl would stick her tongue in my mouth i felt kinda eh. its kinda weird i guess i kiss the wrong people and i don't feel the connection. i get this tingle feeling? its not that good feeling like butterflies. i don't know. simple kisses are nothing to me, if your my friend i wouldn't mind kissing you at all. seriously i would kiss you if you wanted a kiss. i just don't want people to get me wrong and think that i like them or anything. thinking about it now i actually like making out. i don't mean PDA status you know. if i would make out with someone i like i would rather do it alone somewhere with no one around looking at us. I repeat if i make out with people at a party or what so ever that's because im on something ;). hey i can have a little fun i wouldnt mind making out with attractive girls. i sound harsh -_-.
my lips has touch: ;)
meli
mells
amparo
delilah
megan
jorelle
matthew
randy
robert
monique
marifel
reva
tu
shannon
luisa
maibes
thats all i can think of right now, oh yeah i kiss boys too. haha!
i think a kiss is a kiss. pecks/simple kisses. nothing special.well it is special its cute but talking about kissing someone and people make a big deal out of it. i remember telling my friend Lucy Ta i hate making out. i felt like making out was kind of disgusting i guess because i don't really enjoy making out. i remember whenever a girl would stick her tongue in my mouth i felt kinda eh. its kinda weird i guess i kiss the wrong people and i don't feel the connection. i get this tingle feeling? its not that good feeling like butterflies. i don't know. simple kisses are nothing to me, if your my friend i wouldn't mind kissing you at all. seriously i would kiss you if you wanted a kiss. i just don't want people to get me wrong and think that i like them or anything. thinking about it now i actually like making out. i don't mean PDA status you know. if i would make out with someone i like i would rather do it alone somewhere with no one around looking at us. I repeat if i make out with people at a party or what so ever that's because im on something ;). hey i can have a little fun i wouldnt mind making out with attractive girls. i sound harsh -_-.
my lips has touch: ;)
meli
mells
amparo
delilah
megan
jorelle
matthew
randy
robert
monique
marifel
reva
tu
shannon
luisa
maibes
thats all i can think of right now, oh yeah i kiss boys too. haha!
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Are people born gay or do they learn to be gay?
for my point of view i cant say for other people, but as for me im sure i was born gay. i don't think i learn to be gay that's ridiculous. i think if i was learning to be gay it would be like making my self turn gay. that's just my point of view, i may not be right or wrong its just what i feel. it's a opinion. agree or disagree. i sure i was born gay because i feel like im trap in a woman body, most people who transgenders feel that way. i know i was interested in girls when i was young. never met my mom she left me when i was born. lived with my dad and uncle, starting living with my step mom at age 3. dad always dressed me up in boy's clothes and i always was shirtless. i remember playing house with my step siblings and i would always be the dad -_-. i find it kinda funny. i always ignore that question everybody always ask "do you like girls?" i always get my way out of that question i pretend like i don't hear it, i change the subject, i do everything i can just to not answer that question because i was not comfortable about it. what sucks is that i get so shy i get red it makes me like look like "oh shes lying" oh how i hate that. i think im going off subject? i just felt that i liked girls all my life i was more interested in girls and like playing with girls and being around girls, being around boys is cool too, especially when they see me as a guy. but JUST know im a girl.
Opening up was a piece of cake! hmm nah just kidding i guess opening up about being a lesbian was alright, it wasnt a big deal. i told my closest friends about it first. i know some of my close friends already think/know im gay already but they never ask or talk about it. I open up around 10thgrade, when i open up to my friends it was fucking GREAT! i felt the love i felt happy i felt like something is off my chest. most time its hard telling your friends cause you think about the negatives shit and how i hang out with so much girls -_- that i might like them. oh gosh. I thought it would be hard telling my parents, i hate hiding stuff or lying to my parents. one day i told my step mom she said "oh ok and she laughs like i dont care it doesnt matter what gender you like. im GAY TOO!" i know she jokes but she doesnt mind she cares for me and always will. <3. i was really scared telling my dad! When i told him he looked at me with a mean face and said "Ok" and i was like "I like GIRLS! ima go get a girlfriend and take her home!" he just didnt say anything. The best out story when i told my Aunt she was SHOCK. when i told her i was gay and i liked girls she looked at me and said realllly?! i thought you had a boyfriend. Wow.... i started laughing. i said oh hell no its cause i have few close guy friends. she talked to me about girls and this and that and about my other aunt cause i have a GAY aunt and my grandma doesnt accept her and my gay aunt dad doesnt accept her. i felt bad , i told my grandma im gay and she gives me a Frown look. i Guess shes just old school, but hey you gotta deal with it. I feel great now im so open im the gayest bitch alive. No ok im not the gayest bitch alive im gay though and im sure everyone knows.
i went way off subject. o.O
i learn that if you hold something inside so long that your hurting your self. let it go. you will feel better.
Opening up was a piece of cake! hmm nah just kidding i guess opening up about being a lesbian was alright, it wasnt a big deal. i told my closest friends about it first. i know some of my close friends already think/know im gay already but they never ask or talk about it. I open up around 10thgrade, when i open up to my friends it was fucking GREAT! i felt the love i felt happy i felt like something is off my chest. most time its hard telling your friends cause you think about the negatives shit and how i hang out with so much girls -_- that i might like them. oh gosh. I thought it would be hard telling my parents, i hate hiding stuff or lying to my parents. one day i told my step mom she said "oh ok and she laughs like i dont care it doesnt matter what gender you like. im GAY TOO!" i know she jokes but she doesnt mind she cares for me and always will. <3. i was really scared telling my dad! When i told him he looked at me with a mean face and said "Ok" and i was like "I like GIRLS! ima go get a girlfriend and take her home!" he just didnt say anything. The best out story when i told my Aunt she was SHOCK. when i told her i was gay and i liked girls she looked at me and said realllly?! i thought you had a boyfriend. Wow.... i started laughing. i said oh hell no its cause i have few close guy friends. she talked to me about girls and this and that and about my other aunt cause i have a GAY aunt and my grandma doesnt accept her and my gay aunt dad doesnt accept her. i felt bad , i told my grandma im gay and she gives me a Frown look. i Guess shes just old school, but hey you gotta deal with it. I feel great now im so open im the gayest bitch alive. No ok im not the gayest bitch alive im gay though and im sure everyone knows.
i went way off subject. o.O
i learn that if you hold something inside so long that your hurting your self. let it go. you will feel better.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
RAGE.
KINKY RAGE SATURDAYS.
last night went clubbing with : nary tai annie marifel jaddis jenny yen.
i never went to rage and i always heard about Friday rage and never Saturdays so when we got to the place i was pretty high i thought we were at the wrong place haha!! seriously i was like wtf i think were at the wrong place this is the wrong night or something, a minute i was tripping. we waiting and camera whore a little bit and jeez the gay gogo dancers had some nice body! i wish i had that body! sexy! cute gay guys. right when the dance floor was open we went and danced it was fun! :) i was in my own world for a little bit :) when my high was going away boo, but i had fun still. :) there was alot of guys, but girls starting to come. i saw few cute girls only few. we went up stairs for the hop-hop stage no one was really dancing and we went to the lounge to sit and dance against the rails it was nice up there. kept dancing and enjoying my time and all of a sudden i turn around i see jaddis giving marifel a lapdance and im like O.o whoa! that was nice jaddis ;). they were having a lapdance battle with these two gay guys ! omg another thing nary took pictures of her self with one of the gay guy camera cause she thought it was one of ours. omg its still in his camera i wonder what he thinks, he probably would be like "what the hell who is she!" lmao!
dancing with marifel and jaddis against the rail was getting hot :) . that was sexy. i couldnt hang though.
what a great night.with great friends.
last night went clubbing with : nary tai annie marifel jaddis jenny yen.
i never went to rage and i always heard about Friday rage and never Saturdays so when we got to the place i was pretty high i thought we were at the wrong place haha!! seriously i was like wtf i think were at the wrong place this is the wrong night or something, a minute i was tripping. we waiting and camera whore a little bit and jeez the gay gogo dancers had some nice body! i wish i had that body! sexy! cute gay guys. right when the dance floor was open we went and danced it was fun! :) i was in my own world for a little bit :) when my high was going away boo, but i had fun still. :) there was alot of guys, but girls starting to come. i saw few cute girls only few. we went up stairs for the hop-hop stage no one was really dancing and we went to the lounge to sit and dance against the rails it was nice up there. kept dancing and enjoying my time and all of a sudden i turn around i see jaddis giving marifel a lapdance and im like O.o whoa! that was nice jaddis ;). they were having a lapdance battle with these two gay guys ! omg another thing nary took pictures of her self with one of the gay guy camera cause she thought it was one of ours. omg its still in his camera i wonder what he thinks, he probably would be like "what the hell who is she!" lmao!
dancing with marifel and jaddis against the rail was getting hot :) . that was sexy. i couldnt hang though.
what a great night.with great friends.
whats chest binding?
she is n-a-s-t-y.
whats binding: here for the people who wants to know whats binding. lets make this kinda short. um its what most tomboys do when they want a flat chest. not a complete flat chest but compress your tits down.
most people bind with ace bandage. i always wanted to try the ace bandage but fuck that i was like i have to wrap my tits and its going to be a hassle every time i have to get ready. chest binding takes time. also most trans-men bind their chest then get chest surgery. so since i been reading a lot about trans-men they have a site called under-works which sells so much! i love it. i fell in love! when i found out about the website i order a tri-top chest binder which is 30:00 dollars plus tax. expensive cause man i don't want only one i want more, i just bought one just to see how i like it. then after i found out if i get 3 its 84dollars.damn it! when i receive my binder wow! i tried it! bam! i liked it! first place i wore my binder was at COSTCO haha! what i kinda dislike is that my belly is getting bigger and shit i need to loose it soon cause i look like a balloon. its funny cause my family was like oh shit your flat,i can tell though cause i look kinda stiff. but its funny. i love it though. its time to get more :) i wanna try other styles they have. mmm
i was going to post a picture but i cant find no great picture. boo.
pros: i get to wear t shirts alone, no big tits!, slim dress shirt. i feel more confident.
cons: hate the material, have to wear a shirt under the binder, i get hot easily cause im fat.
getting ready : take my shower wash up, wear my tank top or t shirt then put on my binder and wear another shirt over or whatever i want on top. i kinda dislike wearing so much shirts under. blah. its a hassle, i get hot and start sweating.
whats binding: here for the people who wants to know whats binding. lets make this kinda short. um its what most tomboys do when they want a flat chest. not a complete flat chest but compress your tits down.
most people bind with ace bandage. i always wanted to try the ace bandage but fuck that i was like i have to wrap my tits and its going to be a hassle every time i have to get ready. chest binding takes time. also most trans-men bind their chest then get chest surgery. so since i been reading a lot about trans-men they have a site called under-works which sells so much! i love it. i fell in love! when i found out about the website i order a tri-top chest binder which is 30:00 dollars plus tax. expensive cause man i don't want only one i want more, i just bought one just to see how i like it. then after i found out if i get 3 its 84dollars.damn it! when i receive my binder wow! i tried it! bam! i liked it! first place i wore my binder was at COSTCO haha! what i kinda dislike is that my belly is getting bigger and shit i need to loose it soon cause i look like a balloon. its funny cause my family was like oh shit your flat,i can tell though cause i look kinda stiff. but its funny. i love it though. its time to get more :) i wanna try other styles they have. mmm
i was going to post a picture but i cant find no great picture. boo.
pros: i get to wear t shirts alone, no big tits!, slim dress shirt. i feel more confident.
cons: hate the material, have to wear a shirt under the binder, i get hot easily cause im fat.
getting ready : take my shower wash up, wear my tank top or t shirt then put on my binder and wear another shirt over or whatever i want on top. i kinda dislike wearing so much shirts under. blah. its a hassle, i get hot and start sweating.
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